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Edit: Thank you to those people who were willing to take time out of their day to cheer me up. I get like this a lot, and things like this pop up. Even though I did seriously consider it, only now do I realise what I want to do.
So to be blunt, Natalie... Fuck you.

Given recent... admissions, I am honestly considering on giving up drawing.
Now I know plenty of people do this, and this isn't even the first time I'm saying this, but this time round there's a serious connotation to it, and here's why:

Recently, my girlfriend admitted to the following: I have not improved in my art ever since we've met. And if you want a time-frame for that, that would be about 3.5 years.

I always personally thought that I had made progress, but it seems as though outside perception disagrees... And if I take into account my followers' decreasing interest in my work, it would seem as though many people share the same sentiment. Perhaps I am just a talentless hack who has had the wool pulled over my eyes in believing that what I'm drawing is worth something. Numbers/statistics would suggest that.

Well, what do you think? Think I should quit while I'm... not even ahead? Should I continue to draw and continue to disappoint? Do you actually think I've improved, or do you agree with my girlfriend? Your thoughts would be welcome.

... Oh, and if anyone comments on this ignoring the question and asks for my Steam info (I'm not naming names nor pointing fingers here), I am going to outright ignore you.

Not dead

Journal Entry: Sat Mar 1, 2014, 2:42 AM
Disappointing, I know.

Anyway...

I'm going to keep this short and brief: The Group 10 Robot Masters poster didn't do very well in proportion to the time and effort I spent on it, so I don't think labouring to do another one is worth it. Should I just post the pencil drawings for the other groups directly here instead of spending days-worth of time digitising them? It's be a whole lot faster and will help to show that I'm still doing something.

Unless you think I really ought to inject all my effort into making something like that again. Just letting you know that in the end, the poster made no money (yeah, whoever voted on the poll that I'd get money off of it were dead wrong), and had a meager response.

So, thoughts?


Breaking in 2014 with a feature journal

Journal Entry: Thu Jan 2, 2014, 4:25 AM
The copy-paste stuff:

For the first 15 people who comment on this journal, I will feature one of their characters. I'll also tell you what I like about them. [I will go to your gallery and pick one character, you don't need to tell me which one].If you comment, please do the same in your journal, putting the tagger (or original journalist) in the first slot. The idea of this is not to get a free feature, it is to spread art around for everyone! I'm looking forward on you!

The features:

1. jasperoura :iconjasperoura:
His Love by jasperoura

If any of you know her, you'll know that Jasperoura, aka Nora, has quite a myriad of characters. But my favourite of hers is always going to be Jasper. His design, personality and powers are interesting, and Jasperoura's drawings of him always capture his image perfectly. This image in particular (that I recently favourited) is coloured, shaded, drawn and lighted exceptionally well, and is probably my favourite Jasper art to date ^^


Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, guys!

Journal Entry: Wed Dec 25, 2013, 6:16 AM
I am so sorry for being gone for so long. Uni life drains a man.
But hopefully in 2014 I'll manage my workload better and be able to upload more stuff for you guys to groan at =P
Either way, I hope you guys have a good holiday and a great 2014!

Oops...

Journal Entry: Sun Nov 10, 2013, 11:01 PM
Underestimated my maths work, guys...
OKAY OKAY OKAY

THIS WEEK

THIS WEEK

I'LL GET AROUND TO IT

... Still not sure about uploading, though.


Okay, guys...

Journal Entry: Fri Nov 8, 2013, 4:11 PM
I SWEAR I'LL COME BACK.
I KNOW LOADS OF THINGS HAVE EATEN UP MY TIME, LIKE MATHS PROBLEMS AND SHIT.
BUT THIS WEEKEND I PROMISE TO GO OVER MOST OF THE DEVIATIONS I SKIPPED OVER AND I'LL COMMENT ON THEM.
SO EXPECT LIKE AN ONSLAUGHT OF COMMENTS ON ANCIENT ART.
I'M SO SORRY.
I MIGHT NOT UPLOAD ART THOUGH.
APPARENTLY PLENTY OF PEOPLE TELL ME I SUCK AT IT.
ONLINE AND OTHERWISE.
MAYBE, MAYBE NOT. WE'LL SEE, DEPENDS ON MY MOOD.

I DON'T KNOW, I FEEL VERY CONFLICTED AND CONFUSED RIGHT NOW.

A cold slap of reality

Journal Entry: Wed Sep 18, 2013, 6:49 AM
Urgh... Super down and all.
Let me explain my situation right now: I'm heading off to university on Saturday, and once I'm there, I'm sure my time to draw and stuff will reduce tremendously. I probably will hardly come here, since I'll be really busy with work. I'm always hoping I won't be, but when I gotta work, I gotta work. Plain and simple.

Second: I've been away for about 2 weeks, and I've got A LOT of catching up to do. I'm not going to ignore my duties to comment, I'm no hypocrite (well, I am but anyway). I did manage to slice away deviations that don't need my attention, so the actual number of deviations I need to look over is... 51. Manageable.

Third: I'm losing my motivation to draw once again. It's really been driven home to me that what I'm drawing is just not interesting enough. And those aren't my words. Those were someone else's regarding my rant (which is still drawing attention, for some reason), and it's pointless to argue back. The evidence really speaks for itself. I'm getting less and less feedback recently with each passing deviation I upload, regardless of effort or time put in (the amount of productive response I get on deviations I spend weeks upon weeks working on are really disappointing; case-in-point, the group 10 poster). I really am starting to despair over this and I hate myself for it, among other things.
I might shift focus of my drawing onto another franchise soon (working on Dangan Ronpa OC artwork), so if you guys are looking for a breath of fresh air, there's that to look forward to. Or if you want me to shut up and leave... University can take care of that.

Fourth: Dangan Ronpa OCs (as mentioned above).

Kazeyari Manzoku (満足 風槍 - Manzoku Kazeyari)
SHSL Pilot

Soaku Ikasama (如何様 粗悪 - Ikasama Soaku)
SHSL Cheater

Yubijun Uzujiten (渦自転 指順 - Uzujiten Yubijun)
SHSL Yo-yoist

Yori Shikyoo (司教 頼 - Shikyoo Yori)
SHSL Chessmaster


Gone for two weeks.

Journal Entry: Fri Aug 30, 2013, 5:34 PM
Not that I've been active on here to begin with =.=
When I get back, I swear to comment on stuff I've been too lazy to comment on ;3;
Anyway, see you guys soon!

This video...

Journal Entry: Mon Aug 12, 2013, 4:55 PM
Where has it been all my life?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=G1YWWT…

Ocsttiac's Robot Masters and Their Details

Journal Entry: Wed Jul 17, 2013, 1:10 PM
I had way too much time on my hands and decided to create a spreadsheet on all my robot masters and their details, including weapons, weaknesses, good points, bad points, likes, dislikes, quotes and stages.

It's for public access: docs.google.com/spreadsheet/cc…
Have fun looking at the product of having no life.

Glorious!

Journal Entry: Tue Jul 16, 2013, 10:15 AM
Hey guys! How you doin'?
I'm dead :D

... Okay, by that I meant that the heat of the summer sun is killing me =_=;;;;;;; (that's not even embarrassment sweat)

So I'm still working on my little project on my robot masters... And there's no point in hiding it: I'm doing posters for all 10 groups of robot masters, including redrawing all of them and upgrading their designs ONCE again. If you want to imagine what they'll be like, the Group 10 poster can act as an example: ocsttiac.deviantart.com/art/Gr…

Posters I have drawn:

Group 1 [/]
Group 2 [X]
Group 3 [ ]
Group 4 [ ]
Group 5 [ ]
Group 6 [ ]
Group 7 [/]
Group 8 [X]
Group 9 [X]
Group 10 [X]

OKAY, SO THE MAIN REASON I MADE THIS JOURNAL:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=98DG-r…

As a Mega Man fan, I am biased in saying that this is probably my favourite thing that has come from BitF.
Now, if only he covered Mega Man & Bass… And the Game Boy games… And accentuated his exclusion from Capcom's recent fighting games…
#Iamapickynerd


Done

Journal Entry: Thu Jun 27, 2013, 1:05 AM
Truth be told, I'm writing this to kill time while Steam stuff updates.

I'm done with exams, so expect to see more shit from me :P

Sorry for the silence

Journal Entry: Fri Jun 14, 2013, 1:50 PM
Silence...

Sorry for my general absence, I'm kinda in the middle of my exams, and not only do I have to revise and do them, but my Nazi-stringent parents are really restricting the time I have to just relax.

Free time? Turn that time into revision time. Taking a nap? Wake the fuck up and do a paper. This is how every day pans out, if I don't have an exam that day (but even then, sometimes they'll subject me to more work after I've done an exam).

So naturally, when I do have time to myself (the little amount I get), the last thing I want to do is draw or think of a comment to write on someone's work. I mean, in ways I've already bound myself to the obligation of commenting on all the art I get in my deviantWATCH messages, but I really don't want to do it... My head just hurts too much to think of anything substantial.

But I'll get around to it eventually. I know some probably don't care that I haven't been on that much, and I wouldn't blame you: Place that worry on something more worthwhile than just one guy who's gone missing for a few days.
Those that do care, he's your explanation, and I'll give you the comments I promised you.

Again, sorry.

Silence... Will fall.


Nitpicks with Mega Man in Super Smash Bros

Journal Entry: Wed Jun 12, 2013, 3:25 AM
Disclaimer: THIS IS A JOKE. These are not serious problems I have with Mega Man being in Super Smash Bros. I just find it fun to nitpick XD



1. Mega Man doesn't change colour when he uses different weapons.

2. Mega Man shouldn't be able to aim Hard Knuckle straight down.

3. Leaf Shield shouldn't travel with Mega Man. The moment he moves in any horizontal fashion, that baby should go flying.

4. Spark Shock doesn't work that way.

5. Flame Blast doesn't work that way, either.

6. It seems Mega Man's internal monitor uses Keiji Inafune's artwork for all the robot masters. Why not use the Higurashi artwork for robot masters from Mega Man 1-6? They look much better.

7. Why does Mega Man have Top Spin? Hasn't he learnt that that's one of the most useless weapons EVER?!

8. Seems like only Rush is around to help Mega Man. What about Beat? Or Eddie? Or Tango?

9. Since when could Mega Man crouch?

10. Yellow Devil doesn't enter the room like that.

  • Playing: FIRE EMBLEM AWAKENING

MEGA MAN IN NEW SUPER SMASH BROS GAME

Journal Entry: Tue Jun 11, 2013, 8:16 AM
Just imagine me crying tears of joy, screaming "YES!" at the top of my lungs and collapsing to the ground the instant I saw that in the Nintendo Direct stream.

JUST FOR THIS, A WII U IS COMPLETELY COOL AND I NEED ONE. JUST FOR THIS.

By the way, what did you guys think of the June 2013 Nintendo Direct? XD

  • Playing: FIRE EMBLEM AWAKENING ;n;

Art features for all you creatures

Journal Entry: Sun May 19, 2013, 2:20 PM
-> For each of the first 10 people to comment to this journal, I will feature one of their characters/pieces of art. I'll also tell you what I like about them.

-> If you comment, please do the same in your journal, putting the tagger on in the first slot. The idea of this is not to get a free feature, it is to spread art around for everyone!

Or... You know... Don't... You don't have to if you don't want to ._.
This also applies to do who don't draw as well. I still might have nice things to say about you =P

1. Batty-Brandyn :iconbatty-brandyn:

2. PsychoticGex :iconpsychoticgex:

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

  • Listening to: Cool music in general
  • Reading: Dangan Ronpa
  • Watching: Fullmetal Alchemist
  • Playing: NOT FIRE EMBLEM AWAKENING ;n;

'Bout time if you asked me

Journal Entry: Wed May 15, 2013, 10:53 AM
:iconsylvaur:

This man has drawn a wonderful comic portraying the pain and suffering of those who receive countless faves with little to no meaning to them. He has perfectly captured the agony of the everyday artist who only wants to improve his craft, but only gets a mouse click. He has managed to convey the sheer struggle for us to achieve anything in our lives, due to the many soulless individuals who believe a fave can replace a comment.

Also, he referred to my huge journal about faving-and-running. He is instantly in my good book C:

Here's the wonderful comic he drew.

  • Listening to: ZX/ZXA soundtracks
  • Reading: Clash of Kings
  • Watching: Fullmetal Alchemist/Evangelion movies
  • Playing: NOT FIRE EMBLEM AWAKENING ;n;

Seriously...?

Journal Entry: Sat Apr 27, 2013, 3:04 AM
Oh good sweet merci- I just came across someone who does art on MS Paint. Now I'm not one to condone people for not having good software (hell, some people can make MS Paint stuff look GOOD), and I'm also not one to chastise someone's art style... But my God, this stuff looks REAL bad. Like, your usually MS Paint crap: Wobbly lines, awkward colour choices, no shading, disproportionate drawings, and the like.
I won't name who they are, I'm above that.

But goodness gracious, it's just too hard to stoma- Wait, what? ... Say that again? ... O-one more time?

... They have more than twice the watchers I do...

... I feel so inadequate right now...

  • Listening to: ZX/ZXA soundtracks
  • Reading: Clash of Kings
  • Watching: Fullmetal Alchemist/Evangelion movies
  • Playing: NOT FIRE EMBLEM AWAKENING ;n;

For fans of the Railway Series...

Journal Entry: Tue Apr 16, 2013, 5:06 PM
I made a quiz on all of the stations on the Island of Sodor: www.sporcle.com/games/Ocsttiac…

Please give it a go, and good luck =)

  • Watching: Fullmetal Alchemist

Losing motivation

Journal Entry: Fri Apr 12, 2013, 4:50 PM
... You know, those prints have still made me no money. Three of you owe me $10 each... You know who you are, it's just that I don't...

So anyway, in a creative rut at the moment. I have a new piece of art sort of in work, but I'm not too pleased by the anatomy... So motivation is draining again.

Same kinda goes for my videos too; I'm getting less views with every video, I'm wondering when I'll dip back into 0 views per video again.

I dunno, I'm losing my drive to create anything. That artwork I slaved over got negligible attention, and it was only until I whined about it on Twitter that two more people (one being a friend, so interpret that however you want) gave me pity... Hell, putting it into a group did nothing to raise its attention ;_;

I'm starting to ruminate slowing down to a halt when it comes to drawing. I've got less and less to work with now. I only have my robots, my gym leaders, a stick-man and stupid things like Brief Seeds... I wonder when people will get bored of my shit, you know?

Same for videos too; LPing is getting tiresome for both me and people who have to put up with me begging them to watch it.

Oh well, maybe something will come along and get me out of the dumps... Hopefully.

  • Watching: Fullmetal Alchemist